Monday, August 6, 2007

Spinning ~ Again

You guessed it ~ spinning out of control ~ again! You know that feeling you get when you have gotten onto a ride at the fair and realize after the ride has started that you really weren't sure what you were getting yourself into until it was too late. You just shut your eyes and hold on for dear life and tell yourself that it will all be over in a couple of minutes. The spinning will stop soon. Well ~ shutting my eyes really tight and holding onto my desk does not work that well while I am at work. It doesn't bode well for a very productive Monday!

So ~ how do I really feel about all of this??? I am not a happy camper ~ I never realized how closely emotions are linked ~ like MAD & SAD. When I am having a lot of symptoms, I tend to be angry most of the day ~ which is a really bizarre phenomenon ~ because I am really feeling sad. It's confusing, even to me ~ it's like everything in my brain has been put in a blender and mixed up. Then, I am supposed to look at what's left and make some sense out of it ~ SERIOUSLY makes me feel like a crazy person! So ~ a word of advice to friends and family ~ if I say something mean ~ don't take it personally ~ it's my brain tail talking and not me! But, seriously, in advance ~ 'I am sorry!'.

1 comment:

Linda said...

I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I can relate. I always know when it is going to be "one of those days" and I tell my hubby first thing when he gets up, "I am sorry for anything I say that is mean, short and generally hurtful." He is a sweetie dealing with me when I am like this. I am so short, angry and in pain but as you say I am really so sad inside. I just blame it on my brain that it is so mixed up it can't even throw emotions out in the right fashion. :)

Hang in there lady. Sending gentle hugs your way. {{{HUGS}}}