Sunday, August 2, 2009

PAIN Is Weakness Leaving the Body


Pain is Weakness Leaving Your Body - Nietzsche

Brain surgery isn't 100% successful ~ I knew the odds going into my decompression. Honestly, I didn't expect a 100% recovery.  After all, I still have cranial settling ~ I can't remember the exact weight it took to lift my head off my spine before I felt relief during my invasive cervical traction, but it was over 20lbs.  Coming to terms with the fact that my brain tail will always be with me is a tough fact to digest.

I'm not sharing this with you in any way to get the sympathy vote ~ just sharing what's on my heart. Yesterday I woke up feeling like I had been mowed over by a dump truck ~ an all familiar feeling that I hadn't felt really since my surgery. As I was waiting for the effects of my first cup of coffee to take effect I made a mental note ~ warning alarms going off in my mine ~ this just might be one of those days when a chiari headache totally hijacks my body. So later in the day when I could feel that fullness feeling at the base of my head I knew it would only be a matter of hours before I had to lie down in a dark/quiet room. 

Believe me, I fought the headache with every ounce of energy. I sufficiently hydrated myself, tried not to bend over at all, no cardio workouts ~ I mostly spent most of the day doing a thousand loads of the girl's camp laundry. Then, around suppertime, in the middle of preparing dinner, I suddenly had to stop what I was doing and lay down on the couch. The nausea had set in and the pounding in my head reduced me to tears. An hour after I had taken my high powered migraine meds the headache was still going strong, so I decided to throw in the towel and go to be for this night.  

I am praying that these types of episodes will be few and far between.  More than anything, it's just so discouraging to know that brain surgery hasn't made me exempt to chiari headaches. *sigh* .  With that said ~ I truck load of weakness left my body yesterday ~ looking forward to a stronger me in the upcoming days. There is no cure for chiari yet ~ keeping the faith for a cure/procedure to rid all of us chiarians from headaches for life! 

2 comments:

Patti said...

Hi Lacie~thinking of you and hoping you are seeing the end of this headache! Hang tough, friend!
Hugs to you~Patti

BillyBob said...

I am really sorry to hear you are having These set backs. I pray that they might be far and few between. God bless you. Love, Bobby, not the liver.