Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Not A Good Sign

Did I ever mention that I am strong willed????
One has to accept pain as a condition of existence. One has to court doubt and darkness as the cost of knowing. One needs a will stubborn in conflict, but apt always to the total acceptance of every consequence of living and dying. ~Morris West
I have known all along since I was introduced to my Brain Tail that everything would happen in God's perfect timing ~ I have this image of me sliding into TCI in the nick of time ~ like someone collapsing just over the finish line after running a marathon.

I have read stories about other Chiarians who have had trouble walking and I couldn't quite understand that until now. So ~ I was on the treadmill at the gym last night ~ fighting back the tears as faced the reality that I am on a steep decline. I remember only a year ago when I was able to run 6+ miles at a respectable 6 miles an hour pace. My goal was to walk for 30 minutes ~ I set the pace at a paltry 3.5 mile per hour ~ about 10 minutes into my workout I noticed that I couldn't feel my legs anymore and needed to hold onto the treadmill so I wouldn't fall off the end ~ oi! Not a good sign ~ but the good news is that my body is telling me to cool my jets until I get to TCI ~ not an easy order to follow ...


Anonymous said...

Hi, Wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you!

Take care, Sherri

Caroline said...

Hi Lacie,

Yes, we do need to listen to our bodies don't we. They tell us loud and clear what is too much for us. I pray that your surgery gives you back your former energy and abilities.



Puglet said...

Hang in there, Miss Thang. it does get better..and I can't believe I'm saying that. Right now it's hard to walk. Last year i couldn't swallow..and almost 1 year later, here comes India, baby! START PLANNING YOUR TRIP! And if you can, maybe 2 months after surgery, try and go someplace sunny and warm with quiet and water...it's sooo much better than morphine.

BillyBob said...

Sharon was diagnosed before TCI existed. We chose to wait. It was God's will , we believe that we waited, because she found the best surgeon outside of New York to do her surgery. She started to go downhill very quickly in the monthe before surgery. I dont know if her brain was
saying to us"Hurry up!!" Maybe that is happening to you. Any, I am so praying for you.